The Eye of the Storm

If you think this is going to be a blog post about my knowledge of meteorology, I'm sorry to disappoint you. However, know that if I did write such a post that it would be either very short, or nearly a copied and pasted article from Wikipedia.

Anyways!

Today, I'd just like to share with you some thoughts that I have floating around in my brain. So, here goes ...

It's amazing the amount of pressure that can force its way into one's chest.

Sometimes it really feels like you just want to burst. You want to scream and cry and punch a wall because you're so frustrated that everything is completely out of control, or, at least, out of your control.

This is what I like to call a life "storm".

Sometimes, you see it coming. Sometimes, it comes out of nowhere. And, sometimes, it's nothing like what you had predicted. (Thank you, Weather Channel of my mind.)

For a while, you feel very defeated - like there is nothing you can do but sit there and take it. It's similar to that feeling you might've had as a kid looking out the window during a bad thunderstorm. You feel so small and meaningless ... Maybe even sick to your stomach. What can one so little do against a storm so big and strong?

The wind keeps raging. The rain's still pouring.

It seems relentless - just like your thoughts of "How can I solve this?" that lead up to the only reality you can see ...

"I can't."

I know I have felt this way numerous times.

It's one of the worst feelings in the world to have to sit there and watch things be torn apart - things that were once beautiful, or should be, or would have been.

Have you ever watched footage of a tornado tearing through a populated area?

You don't even have to know anyone who lived there to feel the deepest sympathy as homes are blown apart like they were made of nothing more than paper and held no memories within its walls.

You can't help but think about how these people's lives were turned upside-down.

Most of us know what that feels like, even if we haven't been at the mercy of a literal storm.

It's so discouraging to feel so useless.

But I find that, in the midst of things, I am overwhelmed - and not with grief, or anger, but peace.

My Lord Jesus has me in His thoughts always, and I easily forget this.

One thing about weather I do know is that the eye of the storm is also the calmest part of the storm.

... Doesn't that blow your mind?

Right there in the middle of something so vicious and uncaring is where you can find peace.

I thank God that I can stand and watch things fall apart around me, but that does not mean I must yield to the wind and let it destroy me, too.

No matter what your personal views are, when you find yourself at the center of a situation in which you feel you cannot win, know that you have already.

You're at least half way there. Although, you cannot see where it ends, you can rest assured, it does have an end. And you're already stronger and braver than you were when the storm first came, because no matter how puny and weak you felt, you stood your ground.

You did not run.

You faced your fear.

And that is what being brave is all about.

I know! Shocking to find out it isn't about having poofy red hair, a Scottish accent, and a bear for a mom, isn't it?!

I hope that these thoughts have encouraged you, and maybe even made your burden feel a little lighter in knowing that you are not the only one to ever feel this way.

'Til next time ...

~Whitney

Mosaics (Beautifully Broken)

There are times when life picks up a hammer and comes down on us- hard.

In these times, it feels like the blows keep just coming, each hit crushing us into smaller and smaller pieces. Matter of fact, it isn't just a hammer, it's a jackhammer, and life doesn't seem to wanna pull the plug.

We are falling apart.

We think ... There's no coming back from this. I will be a mess forever. There's nothing left of me but shattered remains. How could anyone or anything make use of me now? I am nothing.

If you are broken, why would you think you are no longer beautiful?

Some of the most beautiful works of art are made from broken things. For instance, a mosaic is a picture made up of many pieces. Broken glass has been used to make mosaics, and so has clay, and many other things.

Sometimes we have to be broken.

Does this mean something is wrong with us? Are we just too weak to the point where something can come and take us down with one hit?

No.

You are stronger than you think you are.

If you have ever exercised at any point in your life, you have probably experienced being sore.

The way that muscles become stronger is first by ripping, and then healing. The muscle is ripped by the activity and the stretching, and then it heals and is stronger and better than ever before.

But it had to feel worse to make you better.

I know I ditched my usual system, and this isn't a topic that I can really list facts on, but I felt compelled to step in with a message of hope. You need to know that no matter who you are or where you've been, you are not done for, even when your life is in pieces.

We are not meant to be alone in any sense.

You need to know that you are not alone.

I don't know where I would be without my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. I don't know where I would be without my family. I don't know where I would be without my friends.

I know not everybody believes in God. I know that not everybody has family, and that some people don't have many people they consider friends.

 Every work of art is different and requires different care taking.

But if you are open to God, He will always be there. Even if you aren't at this point, He's still there for you, because He loves you. He is our eternal Father, and a constant, never-failing friend.

 If you don't have a family who acts like they are family, remember that family isn't limited to who shares close blood relations with you, but rather those who come into your life and stay by choice.

If you have a couple of close friends and not many others you would call friends, it is better to have few real friends than to have a hundred fake ones.

If you are currently in a situation that you feel you are drowning in, you will get through this. I promise. You are strong, and this will only make you stronger. Your life is a wonderful story that has not reached its ending. You are a unique work of art still being molded.

You are not finished here. Not even close.

You and I are simply beautifully broken.

Suicide: Elimination

See that picture? That one right there^?

It is indeed a photograph of a suicide note.

And that, my friends, is something that should never happen. No one should ever be driven to that point, to write their last goodbye and take their own life.

This is something I can't imagine being pushed to, and something I cannot stand for, because it's not okay ... It shouldn't happen ever.

1. Who does suicide strike?

75% of suicides stem from depression. It is very vital for parents to keep an eye out for signs of suicidal tendencies in their teens, and teens to look out for this in their friends, or even themselves.

However, suicide, in one way or another, touches us all, even if you've never contemplated it yourself, or had it happen to someone you know, or what not, I can bet that you've read a story about suicide that got to you somehow. And you might've even thought, "How could somebody do that?" Or maybe it brought you to a place in your memory where that question was answered for you already because you were suicidal, too.

Some suicides are the results of other suicides. So if you think that killing yourself will only impact you, you're sorely mistaken.

I cannot begin to explain how much it saddens me that anyone could be so broken, they thought they could never be fixed- that some human being with so much potential, and very much alive in body, was so dead in spirit that they just gave up. They ended their lives, shut down every "what if", forgot about all the good that could come, because they thought the bad would never, ever end.

They did end their lives physically, but their life was left behind: their family, their friends, maybe they had a pet, maybe a boyfriend or girlfriend. Now a part of all these people is dead, too. They're left behind wondering why, and what they could've done, and how could they have been good enough to keep or strong enough to support.

Suicide rates for any age are far too high for my liking, because the number should be at 0% and stay there. Never more than that. But the alarming rate of teen suicides is a whole different kind of devastating. And no, I am not undermining other age demographics. Every situation has its own type of sadness and impact.

2. What is suicide?

It is many things, but I will tell you, suicide is anything but a quick death. Why do I say that? Because suicide isn't just the moment someone ends their own life, it's everything leading up to that. Suicide is contemplated. First it works its way into your mind, haunting your body, whispering in your ear to just give in, because what is it all for? Once it is in you, if it ever does leave, it only comes out in two ways: you overcome, or you succumb.

The title of this blog post is "Suicide: Elimination".

Suicide is an elimination. Takes life out of you, but it doesn't take you out of life.

I guarantee that if you, reading this, if you died right now, your name would forever be in the minds and hearts of others. Probably more than you could conceive.

I chose this title because either suicide eliminates you or you eliminate suicide.

It is high time that the latter be enacted. I wish for all of us to get to a place where suicide is no longer a choice, where the poisonous thoughts don't present this solution.

This is a permanent solution to temporary problems; and honestly, it isn't a solution at all. It is merely a whole new, serious problem.

3. Where can you find the signs?

I won't sit here and pretend to know all the in's and out's, because I really had to read up on these things to be more educated. I would strongly recommend you do the same. It could save a life. So, I do want to refer you to this link: http://teensofamerica.net/resources-for-suicide.html

That will take you to our site for more information on signs that someone (specifically your teen or a teen) is struggling with suicide.

4. When does suicide occur?

It is a chosen end at a very dark part of the road of life. That's when people think they've hit a dead end, when all they needed to do was find some light to see that their road extended only in a different direction.

Someone I care very much for never fails to tell me, "It gets better."

And he's right. It always gets better. Unfortunately, sometimes, it has to get worse before it can get better. Some of us don't stick around to find that out ...

Not every case of suicide is the same, as we all know, even if depression is a leading factor. The thing they all have in common is desperation.

Everyone who committed suicide was desperate for an escape.

If you do not struggle with suicide, make it your goal to be a good reason for someone not to commit suicide.

The things you do and say, even the small ones, could make a huge impact on someone in such a fragile state.

Maybe they're thinking there's no one out there who cares.

I want you to prove them wrong.

Be a friend.

5. Why do people give up?

I couldn't tell you just why every person gave up, only that, obviously, they strongly believed it was their only out, and they had, in their eyes, a good reason.

If you are contemplating suicide. Here's what I want you to do:

Don't.

I know it's not something that you can just turn off with the flick of a switch, although if I could invent it and give you immediate revival of your spirit, trust me, wonderful person, I would.

Suicide doesn't give you control. Death controls you. You don't control death. You can, however, learn to take your life back. Don't let suicide take you away from all that could be.

You're still alive and breathing, and you have to realize what a blessing that is, and that there's a reason you're still here.

Don't rob yourself of the amazing story that is and will be your life, and don't rob others of getting to live in a world made brighter by your smile.

If you know someone who is struggling with suicide, I say again, give those who are the reason why they shouldn't.

I want there to be more options for them other than turning to killing themselves. Let's be the alternative.

Let the other options be turning to real, raw, genuine friendship, and love, and hope, and happiness- the kind that death only strips away.

If you think there's nothing you can do about suicide, you're wrong. You can care. Sometimes, that's enough.

When you're at the end of your rope, why wouldn't it give at least some strength just to hear and see and know that someone cares if you let go and fall?

Better yet, don't just extend the hand to help pull them back up or the words to tell them you want them around. Toss the world's most fluffy mattress at the bottom to catch them.

Aside from my truly pitiful metaphors, I simply want to encourage you to not just help them find hope, I encourage and even challenge you to be hope.

It is a timeless tale of truth: Love (in whatever form that may be) makes a difference.

So, go on, carry your torch a little higher and help light the way for those around you. Don't you ever let that light go out. I might have to find you and hug you until you agree to keep going, and you probably don't want that.

Together, we can stop suicide from eliminating us, and instead, eliminate suicide.

Time for us to turn "Suicide: Elimination" into "Suicide Elimination".

Go forth and be thou amazing.

Teen Pregnancy: Sex Has Consequences

If the above photo kind of feels like a slap in the face from reality, then it has done its job. I really want to touch on accountability in this post, and I am certain I will get to it. I like to be at least somewhat knowledgeable about the things that I post on. I don't want this to be all about what I think, but my thinking on these matters stems from what is.

I just finished reading the testimonial of a girl called Berenice who is now my age and has a two year old son. I sat here on my couch thinking about how I would have felt two years ago to find out I was pregnant and to experience all that comes with that: the responsibility; the heartache; the fear; the mental, emotional, and physical struggle ... I can honestly say I don't know how I would've done it, if I in fact could have.

Right now, I'd like to show you some statistics, and these are only a select few from a massive and detailed list.

1. Who?

-Just about 1 million teen girls become pregnant each year.

Go ahead and read that number again.

-And even with the numbers declining in the U.S., it is still the carrier of the highest rates of teen pregnancy, births, and abortions.

These two facts alone are enough to break my heart. Although, understand this: I sincerely do believe that every life is a gift from God. Whether you share that opinion or not is up to you.

2. What's the deal?

"Sex has consequences" says it all.

Let's face it, even if every precaution there is to have protected intercourse is taken, there is no guarantee pregnancy will not occur. Bottom line- the only way it is possible to be sure this won't happen is to not have sex. That should be a lot simpler than we make it to be.

The thing that upsets me most, personally, is that we say "It's my life to do with what I will," and as true as that is, in cases like this, you are not the sole factor involved. If you take the action, you had better be prepared to take the responsibility.

The worst part is, how many times we do not take the responsibility.

I was slightly encouraged to read that most teen mothers do give birth to their babies and most even keep them. That is amazing. I am completely pro-life. Abortion is not an option to me. If it's anything other than keeping the baby, then I am all for adoption- never abortion. (Again, if you don't share in my belief, that is your choice. I don't expect everyone to share my views.)

The thing that was very sad to read was concerning the fathers.

80% of teen fathers do not marry the mothers of their children.

Guess what that most likely means?

Unfortunately, that child is probably not ever going to have a relationship with its biological father. This is so incredibly saddening to me.

I was thankful to learn that Berenice's child's father did marry her, and they are still together. That is nothing short of inspirational to me. She is even starting a website (Babies Bliss) to share her story and to create a place where teen moms can find support and give it, too.

Nevertheless, the avoidance of accountability to me is astounding, and obviously, not in the good way.

3. Where have we gone wrong?

We don't want to wait. We want to do what we want to do, when we want to do it. This is out of selfish blindness. When it comes to having sex, you might be surprised to learn that a good majority of teens who wish they had waited.

-In a recent poll, 63% of teens who have had sexual intercourse said they

wish they had waited. 55% of teen boys and approximately 72% of teen girls surveyed said they wish they had waited longer to have sex.

Because of human error, through the years, premarital sex has been glamorized in countless ways. As a result, sex has a bad image. It is tainted.

It was meant to be a beautiful and natural experience for a married couple to enjoy. (Don't get me wrong, it still is that, but it is ruined far too many times.) Now, it is easily viewed as trashy and cheap.

If you don't wait and work for something, it's not as special. This applies to many things, especially this.

There is a statistic concerning teens having unprotected sex because of pressure from their partner.

Now, that's just being foolish. That temporary pleasure can spiral into permanent pain if you are careless and thoughtless.

Stop and think about the consequences. They are real and they will change your life.

Finding out you and your significant other are bringing the blessing that is new life into the world should be a glorious time of celebration, not a time that brings gloom and doom.

4. When does this happen?

-About 4 out of 10 young women

get pregnant at least once before they turn 20.

-While teen sexual activity is down among most teens, it has risen among girls younger

than 15.

-The majority of pregnancies between the ages of 15 and 19 (78%) are not planned.

5. Why should you worry?

If you are a teen girl, this could happen to you. Berenice said in her testimony that she thought that it wouldn't happen to her, and I think we are all prone to think we are exceptions, but we aren't. If you make the choice to be sexually active before marriage, you had better make sure you can handle all that it comes with.

If you are a teen guy, it could happen to you too, only (and clearly) in a different way. You wouldn't be carrying the child, but it would be half of you, and also totally your responsibility as well. These things take two. If you think you're man enough to have sex, be man enough to step up to the plate of husband and father.

I'm going to recommend both parties to wait. It is worth it.

If you are a parent of teens, even if you've discussed these things with your children, they are not above falling into this situation. But whatever happens, don't give up on them. The best way to handle this is to love and support. I understand if anger and disappointment occurs, but a mistake isn't worth losing your child and grandchild over.

If you are an adult who doesn't happen to be a parent, I'm sure there are young people you care about. Teen pregnancy affects those who may not even realize. And there are always ways to make a difference in people's lives.

Be aware and be safe. Life is meant to bring joy. Everyone is a gift. Don't take precious things in life for granted.

Lastly,

If you are a teen parent, you are not alone. There are people who want to and will help you! I personally know some teen mothers who have made it and are happy and doing quite well. It was hard, but this is proof, your life isn't over. It has barely begun! The road can be rough, but it won't always be. Let us help you. No one has ever failed, unless they give up.

 Thank you for reading ... You all have been wonderful!