The Eye of the Storm

If you think this is going to be a blog post about my knowledge of meteorology, I'm sorry to disappoint you. However, know that if I did write such a post that it would be either very short, or nearly a copied and pasted article from Wikipedia.

Anyways!

Today, I'd just like to share with you some thoughts that I have floating around in my brain. So, here goes ...

It's amazing the amount of pressure that can force its way into one's chest.

Sometimes it really feels like you just want to burst. You want to scream and cry and punch a wall because you're so frustrated that everything is completely out of control, or, at least, out of your control.

This is what I like to call a life "storm".

Sometimes, you see it coming. Sometimes, it comes out of nowhere. And, sometimes, it's nothing like what you had predicted. (Thank you, Weather Channel of my mind.)

For a while, you feel very defeated - like there is nothing you can do but sit there and take it. It's similar to that feeling you might've had as a kid looking out the window during a bad thunderstorm. You feel so small and meaningless ... Maybe even sick to your stomach. What can one so little do against a storm so big and strong?

The wind keeps raging. The rain's still pouring.

It seems relentless - just like your thoughts of "How can I solve this?" that lead up to the only reality you can see ...

"I can't."

I know I have felt this way numerous times.

It's one of the worst feelings in the world to have to sit there and watch things be torn apart - things that were once beautiful, or should be, or would have been.

Have you ever watched footage of a tornado tearing through a populated area?

You don't even have to know anyone who lived there to feel the deepest sympathy as homes are blown apart like they were made of nothing more than paper and held no memories within its walls.

You can't help but think about how these people's lives were turned upside-down.

Most of us know what that feels like, even if we haven't been at the mercy of a literal storm.

It's so discouraging to feel so useless.

But I find that, in the midst of things, I am overwhelmed - and not with grief, or anger, but peace.

My Lord Jesus has me in His thoughts always, and I easily forget this.

One thing about weather I do know is that the eye of the storm is also the calmest part of the storm.

... Doesn't that blow your mind?

Right there in the middle of something so vicious and uncaring is where you can find peace.

I thank God that I can stand and watch things fall apart around me, but that does not mean I must yield to the wind and let it destroy me, too.

No matter what your personal views are, when you find yourself at the center of a situation in which you feel you cannot win, know that you have already.

You're at least half way there. Although, you cannot see where it ends, you can rest assured, it does have an end. And you're already stronger and braver than you were when the storm first came, because no matter how puny and weak you felt, you stood your ground.

You did not run.

You faced your fear.

And that is what being brave is all about.

I know! Shocking to find out it isn't about having poofy red hair, a Scottish accent, and a bear for a mom, isn't it?!

I hope that these thoughts have encouraged you, and maybe even made your burden feel a little lighter in knowing that you are not the only one to ever feel this way.

'Til next time ...

~Whitney

"Life's Not Fair"

The amount of times we've all been told that life isn't fair is more than likely annoyingly high. The thing is, sometimes, life really isn't fair.

Why is that?

Simply put, it is because people are involved.

The human race is an extremely self-centered group. And, I get it- top of the food chain, and all that jazz, but here's the other thing ...

We aren't in control.

We do affect the overall turnout of almost everything, but that does not make us the master of the universe.

Even if you don't believe in God, this is still the matter of the fact.

I, personally, do believe in God as the Almighty Creator of the universe.

Everything WAS fair. Then man messed it up.

People like to try to turn the tables and say things like, "Well, God could've prevented Adam and Eve from sinning."

Yes, He could have. But God created man with free will for a purpose.

Think about it: Would you get more personal glory from inventing a robot- an unfeeling machine with absolutely no choice to do but what you program it to do-, or from raising a child, teaching it right and wrong, and watching them grow up and make their own choices, and live their own life the best they know how?

I could probably make a guess what your answer would be in the end.

Not all of life is unfair all the time- not for us anyways.

But even Jesus' life on earth wasn't fair at all.

King of Kings, born in a stable, only to grow up and be crucified for crimes He never committed, dying and suffering for sinners who, by nature, mock, scorn, and hate Him, so that they could live forever in Heaven one day.

Any of that sound fair to you?

But, if only for this reason, I am glad life isn't fair.

I am glad to have life in the first place.

When life isn't fair, we should stop to think about why it isn't, but also, why it IS fair.

Fair can also mean "beautiful", like in the story of Snow White, the fairest in the land. Fair didn't mean she went around handing out equal amounts of candy to the local short people. It meant she was beautiful.

Life is always a beautiful thing.

Life isn't always fair, and that's okay, because we still get the chance to live it.

Not everybody is that lucky.

Finally, I'd like to say that even though life isn't always fair, that doesn't mean you can't try to be.

How fair is it to that kid you called weird in school that not only were you not his friend, but spoke ill of him to others?

How fair is it to that customer you mistreated because you were having a bad day at work?

How fair is it that after all they did for you, that you gave your parents a hard time for not getting that one thing you asked for?

Life isn't fair, because we aren't.

But life can be beautiful, even with all of its flaws.

Remember:

You can't control the weather, but you can control your attitude.

... Imma just sayin'.

Mosaics (Beautifully Broken)

There are times when life picks up a hammer and comes down on us- hard.

In these times, it feels like the blows keep just coming, each hit crushing us into smaller and smaller pieces. Matter of fact, it isn't just a hammer, it's a jackhammer, and life doesn't seem to wanna pull the plug.

We are falling apart.

We think ... There's no coming back from this. I will be a mess forever. There's nothing left of me but shattered remains. How could anyone or anything make use of me now? I am nothing.

If you are broken, why would you think you are no longer beautiful?

Some of the most beautiful works of art are made from broken things. For instance, a mosaic is a picture made up of many pieces. Broken glass has been used to make mosaics, and so has clay, and many other things.

Sometimes we have to be broken.

Does this mean something is wrong with us? Are we just too weak to the point where something can come and take us down with one hit?

No.

You are stronger than you think you are.

If you have ever exercised at any point in your life, you have probably experienced being sore.

The way that muscles become stronger is first by ripping, and then healing. The muscle is ripped by the activity and the stretching, and then it heals and is stronger and better than ever before.

But it had to feel worse to make you better.

I know I ditched my usual system, and this isn't a topic that I can really list facts on, but I felt compelled to step in with a message of hope. You need to know that no matter who you are or where you've been, you are not done for, even when your life is in pieces.

We are not meant to be alone in any sense.

You need to know that you are not alone.

I don't know where I would be without my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. I don't know where I would be without my family. I don't know where I would be without my friends.

I know not everybody believes in God. I know that not everybody has family, and that some people don't have many people they consider friends.

 Every work of art is different and requires different care taking.

But if you are open to God, He will always be there. Even if you aren't at this point, He's still there for you, because He loves you. He is our eternal Father, and a constant, never-failing friend.

 If you don't have a family who acts like they are family, remember that family isn't limited to who shares close blood relations with you, but rather those who come into your life and stay by choice.

If you have a couple of close friends and not many others you would call friends, it is better to have few real friends than to have a hundred fake ones.

If you are currently in a situation that you feel you are drowning in, you will get through this. I promise. You are strong, and this will only make you stronger. Your life is a wonderful story that has not reached its ending. You are a unique work of art still being molded.

You are not finished here. Not even close.

You and I are simply beautifully broken.

Relationships

  Alright, ladies. It is time to discuss our most favorite subject ... No, not shoes!! Today's post is all about relationships.

  (Also, quick side note: this isn't solely for girl readers. If it tends to lean that way, it's probably because I, the writer, am female. Sorry, fellas. I'll do my best.)

  1. Who does this blog apply to?

  When you are single, it can sometimes feel like everyone but you is in on the whole dating thing, right? ... Don't lie to me. It happens to the best of us!

  Well, I have good news, single pringles, this post is for E'ERYONE- those who have loved, are loving, will love, and I'd say that covers everybody! I believe it is important that everybody realizes a few key things about relationships, and I hope I can properly address some of these. So, whether you're madly in love or swearing off of guys/girls, I wanna "talk" to you.

  2. "What be these key things thou speakest of, O Blogger who Ranteth?"

  Dating has been and probably always will be a topic with a high buzz of interest following it. Girls love to gossip about it, guys love to brag about it, older people love to reminisce over it, etc.

  The dating world of today really shocks me in some ways.

  You know, for a society that is centered around "being yourself", it tries really hard into making us what it wants us to be, not always what we want to be.

  A vast majority of relationships mimic this pattern.

  You meet someone. You develop crush on said someone. You ponder catching that someone's romantic attention. Everyone, including yourself, gives you the advice to "be yourself." Say you are asked out/ask out this someone, or even if you're not, you are trying to impress this person- sometimes desperately. (For the record, this means me just as much as anyone else. I am guilty.)

  It's not wrong to want to be better for someone else, but a lot of the time this straining process of putting something out there that is something other than who you are doesn't better us. You as you normally are ought to be enough to catch the attention of someone who will really and truly love you. If someone isn't paying you any attention, and I know this is a very hard pill to swallow, but they are the ones missing out. They are not worth your time and effort. Those who matter will notice you because you are wonderfully you. It shouldn't be just because you can do three back handsprings in a row. And someone should never want to change you to fit their ideals. They should love you because of who you are, not in spite of who you are. This "I love you anyway" mentality, should not be.

  3. Where is love? (MUSICAL THEATRE REFERENCE. And ... Sticking with the key things on this question.)

  There are instances where we are looking for love. I get it. I really do, but this is a very fragile state to be in. When we don't find what we're looking for, this is very discouraging. Usually, this begins a depressing spiral of thoughts that we are not good enough, or good looking enough, or special enough to catch the eye of the opposite sex.

  This mindset can lead to settling for anyone who gives you the time of day, which also isn't right.

  I am all for keeping an open mind, mind you. But to me, flings are pointless. Dating is getting to know someone that you just might want to spend the rest of your life with. It's not an excuse to hook up. Sorry, not sorry.

  At the state in which we are searching for a relationship, sometimes we jump too far into something with the first person who shows us interest. This can lead to settling, and settling for things you don't actually want can lead to extreme unhappiness. It is imperative to know what you want in a spouse, and a great amount of these ideals, you shouldn't bend on. The ones that ought to be "immovable" so to speak, should be obvious. I do not mean that if you mentally noted "must have green eyes", and the person you're seeing has blue eyes, to chuck them out. That would be superficial and, for lack of a better term, silly.

  We should check ourselves when we set our standards around the physical appearance of another. *** Physical attraction is extremely important in a relationship. I am not claiming otherwise. *** But, for instance, if a girl is snubbing a guy who is everything she wants in a personality because he doesn't have the muscle definition she likes ... Goodness gracious. Lord, help that child.

  I'd like to say that I hope that doesn't happen often. All I want to point out is that the physical appearance of another should not be our priority.

  Along the lines of physical attraction, I want to make this point very, very clear:

  You cannot love someone at first sight. You can love their looks, and be insanely attracted to them at first sight, and that means that excited, squirmy feelings you get, but you cannot fall in love with THEM.

  Our bodies are only our shells- what we are. Our souls are our essence- who we are.

  It takes time and effort to get to know someone, and falling in love is a constant process that doesn't ever really end. It only perpetuates. Ask someone who has been in love with the same person for a lengthy period of time. Real love grows, it doesn't just peak.

  4. When is it real love?

  Branching from the above paragraph, here's something you should know. This may sting a little for some ...

  Love is not that fuzzy warm feeling you get in the pit of your stomach. Sorry to burst any heart bubbles floating around your head, but it isn't.

  Love is a choice.

  There are going to be many, many times when you do not feel like loving your significant other. You might even dislike them at the moment. Maybe he stained your couch! Maybe she threw away your lucky socks! Whatever the case, there are going to be times when you are upset with your girlfriend/boyfriend/fiancee/spouse. But when you really love someone, you are constantly choosing to love them even when you don't feel like loving them. Loving someone when you feel like it is easy and convenient. When you're angry or grumpy or pouty, it's no longer easy, but it is necessary. That is how you build a proper foundation for a lifetime.

  I also don't believe that you have only one soulmate out there, and if you miss him/her, oh well. You're done! ... No. You could live a perfectly happy life with more than one person. Love is a choice! So choose wisely.

  5. Why is all of this so important?

  I'll tell you. Too often you find people in unhappy relationships because it's not what they thought it would be. They didn't start off as friends. There were fronts they didn't know existed. When they got married, the walls came tumbling down, and their spouse treats them differently, and even, badly.

  Why does THAT happen?

  People aren't taking enough care in building the proper foundation from the start.

  I understand the inclination to date that cutie and marry them within the week, but that's just not realistic.

  Really, you ought to be friends with them first.

  "Oh no! The friendzone!!!" ... Knock it off.

  The friendzone only exists because we feel the need to label everything. Yes, I know the actual definition of friendzone, and it's a real situation, and it sucks majorly.

  Even so, I say, you should know someone as they normally are before dating them.

  You should know what they're like when they're livid just as much as when they're happy.

  Again, why?

  People are on their best behavior when they are dating.

  No, girls. The jerky guy will not be changed by you once you're married. If he's a jerk now, he will probably be a jerk then, and maybe, an even bigger one.

  If their best behavior is treating you like dirt from the get-go, you have a problem that should not exist in a healthy relationship. I don't recommend that you condone that.

  You are not to be looking for a perfect person, because they don't exist. You are going to find every person has their flaws, but you will love those just the same because it makes someone who they are. That's a beautiful thing.

  Dating is about finding what you want in a spouse in someone else. But again, if you are finding their treatment of you less than satisfactory, it won't improve once you sign up for that for the rest of your life. No, they won't always be so amazing, but potential in someone shouldn't just be an idea, it should be a current process.

  If someone isn't trying to shape up now, why would they when they already have you forever?

  Your significant other will not always treat you like a prince/princess, but the real effort should be there.
 
  And girls, let me tell you something else. If a guy won't wait for you, he isn't worthy.

  He won't wait for sex? He isn't worth knowing you in that way.

  I believe in purity until marriage. Not everyone reading this may share that viewpoint, and that is your choice, this is just what I believe.

  No matter what your standing is on that, if someone is talking you into doing things you don't want to do just because they want to do them, they are not looking out for you or your relationship with them, they are only looking out for their own selfish wants and needs. Things like that, especially off the bat, ought to be a HUGE red flag. Many people wind up in abusive relationships and find themselves "stuck" for whatever reason (for example, they are very attached to the one hurting them). This can be prevented by looking out for the right things in a significant other. If you are suffering at the hands of an abusive boyfriend/girlfriend/fiancee/spouse, you need to let someone know and ask for help. You are not stuck. While you are drawing breath, there is always a way out of every situation. Sometimes you only need to ask.

  It's important that you aren't always incredibly intimidated by someone you have interest in. You should be able to be comfortable, and truly be yourself.

  Please remember:

  Love is about putting the other person BEFORE yourself. Never the other way around.

  And ... To love is to lose yourself and gain everything.

  All of that being said, I hope that this broadened your thinking and maybe even helped you out in the ol' love life! Don't forget to subscribe to our blog! I hope that I can provide insightful thoughts for you to read every Friday on whatever the subject may be. Thank you for reading! I thank you in advance for subscribing! And you are amazing!!!